See? The dream meant something.

I just shot myself in the heart. Tonight I die. Tomorrow I shall be reborn.

Bwahahahahaha.. *evil laugh*.

- - -

Well, parang ganoon.

“Youth and their endless cry of craziness! They’ll get over it eventually.”

Sabi niya, you don’t plan it… it just happens.

He was right about that.

—

I went to school early this morning because I had to deal with some pre-enrollment stuffs (sige na nga, they gave the wrong instructions before so there is something we need to do again). It’s not the first problem I encountered and they seem to be testing our Pi.Ey.Ti.Ay.Ee.En.Si.Ee. *Don’t worry, I do have good control of my temper… most of the time. *

When I went out of the vicinity, I noticed the sign that the National Museum was just a block away. ALAS! A perfect place to cool down (besides, I’ve been wanting to go back to the museum again, with a friend nga lang sana). I ended up spending 4 hours inside (nilampasan ko na nga ung iba sa 3rd floor because I’m so excited to view the paintings in the gallery upsatairs) and forgetting “lunch”.  (Problem: hindi kami masyado bati ng “History”, kaya medyo nahirapan ako makarelate sa ibang exhibit)

So there, while in the museum, a friend called me to remind me of Vanessa Carlton’s concert and asked if I want to watch it. Since I’m already out, I said yes na rin. To make the story short, my friend and I got to watch the concert at Trinoma’s Cinema 7 (way better than Colbie’s which was held at the activity center).

Oh and dinner? We ate Burrito at the Cinema then Goto on our way home. Hehe. Saya! I missed eating Goto.

More details tomorrow. Just need to store the few songs she sang my brain has managed to store. (Pero andami na sinabi ano? eheh).

1. More than this
2. Home
3. My Best
4. Pretty Baby
5. White Houses
6. Hands on Me
7. Nolita Fairytale
8. Ordinary Day
9. Thousand Miles
   
10. Hands on Me
    
11. Who’s to Say

And Vanessa also said she likes storms because she was able to get inspiration from it.

Ok. Tomorrow. Later, I mean.

My dream last night…

I was holding a gun (the small one… dunno what it’s called), exploring it’s parts just like a kid who holds one the first time (well, I haven’t held a real gun before). I accidentally pulled the trigger. Out of panic, I surveyed the surrounding and asked if anyone got hurt.

Suddenly, everyone was silent and I figure they were staring at me. It’s when I started to feel “uh-oh, don’t tell me it’s me”. Someone touched her own chest like a signal that I do it too. I touched my chest just below the clavicle but I was like saying to myself, “this is just the bump of my clavicle” (quite funny). I then realized the small bump is way below my clavicle.

Yeah. I shot myself. No pain. No blood. No color. No pain. I was just standing… shocked.

- - -

Really weird dream. I usually dream of situations (kinda in series.. maybe I’ll try to fiction-a-na-lize them when I’m in the mood ). And I’m not even watching t.v. these days! So much drama. Hehe Oh, but my dream is kinda like suspense, ano?

Any interpretation?

Hawakan niya lang ang kamay ko, pakiramdam ko magiging ok na ang lahat.

- - -

Trivia: Ito po ay ilan sa mga unang litratong (cropped) kuha ko gamit ang P&S na camera na gamit at inaaral ko ngayon. Regalo ito ng aking Ina, nabili namin  halos 60% less  sa presyo dito sa Pilipinas.  Ayos!

Litratong Pinoy # 6: Mahal Na Ina

Smile Even If It Hurts by Rev Cruz

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn’t it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life…You give them a piece of you. They didn’t ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn’t your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like ‘maybe we should be just friends’ turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It’s a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.”

- Neil Gaiman

Just a note: That artwork was made by my multi-talented college professor, using his much loved Moleskin. Yes and he sings well too.. aside from being a wise guru. Great ideas. Check out his Deviant Art (using the link of his name.

#2

Tonight was the different. The girl of 16 years, who merely talks to the moon while planting on her garden went up to him this evening. Dancing and twirling in the sky, the moon knows she’s yet again created her own world - the world where she’s free; free from shyness and timidity. She got tired and sat closely beside the moon. No words were said but she was smiling while not even looking at the moon. She lay comfortably.

“Do you remember when I told you I can see everything from up here?”

The girl just smiled.

“How does it feel?”

…

…

“I don’t know. I don’t know how to…”

“But there’s one thing I can say though. At one point, at that magical moment, I felt my soul being sucked or was that me who sucked a part of his soul?. I felt free, I didn’t feel the need to fight, I can lose the fight for it meant winning as well. At that split second, the world stopped… or was it the longest second of my life? I felt blood rushing all over my body but I was kept grounded, I can’t move. It felt the world only consisted of him and me, connected, sharing that one breath…”
“…and it’s the most wonderful thing I’ve felt all my life.”

…

…
Yes, the girl was beside the moon up there and they spent the night together looking at the garden, looking at the flowers starting to bloom and watching the dew drops starting to form on the petals.

Silently.

The moon understood.

[photo credits: Moon Worship, originally uploaded by Araleya.]

Maybe it’s the beach, or the sunset, or the wind blowing her hair, or the way she walks with the child, or maybe the untold story behind, or the universal truth, the denial of the truth, the fantasy, the fiction, the reality.. or how the reality bites…

Diba masarap isipin na ikaw ang mas nasasaktan, dahil ikaw ang mas nagmamahal?

Or maybe the film is simply so pure and sincere.

Nagmamahal

… dahil ang nagamamahal, nagtitiwala.

*Hai*.  And I only watched the trailer.  Hopefully I can watch the film. I will watch the film.

*Sigh*. Silence.

*dances*. Yeah baby, yeah baby, yeah baby.

CRAZY. ano? But seriously, do you care if people see you jump for joy ? (*remembers Tom Cruise @ Oprah*)

So happy and terrified at the same time. AJA.

Didn’t get to watch Pyrolympics. No photos kaya kuwento nalang.

(more…)

Infinity and Beyond

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